dans le jardin avec mes amis

Fuck guys. It's been too long. Working full-time in a poxy coffee shop serving the old, sick, dying or a delightful mix of the lot (not out of choice, unfortunately they seem to make up the population of Fareham), has pushed my thought and creativity into a tiny box and into a dark cupboard so I can cope with the depressing, mundane and bullshit that every day throws at me. Seriously, there is NO eyecandy whatsoever, and every fuck who comes in has something to complain about while I sweat it out, froth up cow secretions with steam and inescapably burn myself in the massive greenhouse this hell hole is situated in, surrounded by milling consumer shit-twats. People of Fareham, think for your fucking selves and get your fucking MINDS back!

Hopefully that little rant put into perspective just how much of a ruiner retail is. But it's cool, I'll give you a little update of what's happened since I been gone.

So, I turned 21. Fuck. Numerically an adult, mentally dumber than ever. Quite a shock, really. When I was 10 I never thought I'd make it to 20, let alone 21. Anyway, I got the BEST present ever from my Nan: a basket of fruit and a basket of veg. What a hero! I also made myself cakes as I doubted anyone I knew could make a vegan cake. I made a lemon and coconut cake and a chocolate orange one. They were both pretty much delish, even if I do say so myself.

Also, in total fucking breaking news, there are Geese in the garden. Mum thought she'd be a hero and get four, three-week-old baby geese. Holy fuck, every time I look at them something inside me breaks, they're so cute! She came home with them maybe a month ago, and in that time they've doubled in size! But I will make a special photo entry of them all at a later date, they need all the attention I can get them.

Okay, actually, I'll speak of them a bit more; we were looking to rescue some geese to give a good home here at the ranch/asylum, but we looked for ages to no avail, so one day mum just came back with four little ba-bas. A couple of weeks ago, she got a response to an ad she put up ages ago, seeking anyone who wanted to give their geese to a good home. The lady ended up coming over an hour later with two big-un's with socks over their heads and pretty much doing a runner. They're one year old, and hand raised and hatched by her, but they were ruining her bushes or something. Stupid people. But anyway, their names are Gwen and Eider and Gwen fucking loves me. He follows me everywhere, stands next to me when I sunbathe and comes into my kitchen. Only downside? If I give him eye-contact or touch him he tries to give me the goose love. Not cool. But who can blame him? Nah I kid, I don't see why it's me! Maybe it's because I don't smell of animal graveyard? More photos to come.

A while back, I attended the "World Day for Animals in Laboratories" march in London. It was my first march/protest, and definitely not the last. I had no idea what to expect, and was, to be totally honest, rather scared. But it was a great day; it felt like a catalyst. It was pretty heavy because all day the reality of the horrors of what we do to animals was too much to bear... Especially when we stopped at Trafalgar Square and the drummers beat the "dun....... dun........ dun......" of the funeral march for part of the way. Here, it really hit home how sick we are to be capable of causing such unnecessary suffering and violence, across all spectrums. But there is hope. The positives outweighed my upset, it was great to see so many people (2000ish?) with the same hope to stop animal suffering.

Hmm, okay, not a lot else of note has happened really! Really regret not keeping up-to-date with mah blogz, would have been a lot more detailed and coherent if I had. Wanted to write a massive thang about the march, but my laptop was out of action. But it's okay, I promise I'm back!

BREAKING NEWS

My laptop/best friend has been down for the past couple of weeks, due to a fuck off trojan that I some how obtained. What a douche. Unfortunately, a lot of interesting things have happened while this misfortune befell me.

Fear the onslaught of many updates in the coming days.

Good nom nom

In secret I have been papping some of my baked vegan delights, in the hope that I'd make a lovely little post about each, as they so rightfully deserve, but unfortunately it has come to this. A food porn post. So, here we go!

Wonderful little polenta pizzas.
The polenta chunxx were massive, but tasty nonetheless.
Think next time I'll make my own polenta though...


Date, cranberry and nut bar.
I make a load and hoik one out of the freezer
if I can't be bothered to make something..

Right, because these are soo delish and delightful and easy, I'm going to do my first recipe!
Delectable date and nut bar

This recipe is pretty haphazard, add as much of whatever or take out/add what you like. It's just important that it has enough sticky stuff to set nicely and not fall apart. You'll see what I mean...

Ingredients:

• 3/4 cup walnuts
• 2/3 cup chopped dates (chop them yourself!)
• 1/2 cup brazil nuts
• 1/4 cup almonds
• 1/8 cup pumpkin seeds, sesame seeds, flax seeds and sunflower seeds (all mixed together)
• 1/4 cup porridge oats
• 1/4 cup cranberries
• 1/3 cup vegan margerine
• 1 and half tbs cocoa powder
• 2 tbs sugar or a healthy squeeze of agave nectar
• Clingfilm, or something similar, to wrap them in

Method:

• Throw everything except the margerine, cocoa powder, sugar/agave and... clingfilm into a food processor (if you're lazy) or chop them by hand. You only want to break them up into little-ish bits, not paste them!
• Melt the butter in a relatively large saucepan, and add the cocoa powder and sugar or agave until all liquid-y
  
• Take the pan off the heat and throw the busted nuts and fruits. Mix until well combined.
• Pull out some clingfilm onto your counter top and put enough mixture in to make a nice-sized bar. Make them into nice packages, it's better if you compact them with your hands as you go, it makes them easier to eat after.

Store these bad guys in the freezer right up until the desire to demolish one takes you!

And finally, my most lovely little creations that made me weep with pride and taste-sensation, my very own vegan bakewell tarts! And an almond and cranberry loaf for good measure!!

For a day or so I'd bee craving almonds, maybe I needed some vitamin E or whatever almonds are good for. So to totally thwart the goodness my body wanted, I had the bright idea of making these sugary little sods. I did use ground almond in the cake mix, and the almond loaf had loads of whole almonds in. They were really fun to make, I'll definitely make them again. I didn't realise how easy pastry is to make!

I made some almond milk too, to wash the three I claimed down with. Can't quite get the milk right though, it's tasty but not quite enough. I add some cinnamon and some agave nectar, but it's a little too watery so all the taste goes to the bottom, even if you mix it. I'm sure I'll get it right one day though.

Thiz iz mah time to shine

So, yet again, it has been a while. Blog, I am a terrible mother.

Anyway. It's half one in the night time. I have handed my notice in at my awesome job in the nut shop to go back to coffee heaven. Fuck. Money is a killer. Doing things you don't want to do so you can just... Well. Get money. Yep. I'm going to be a supervisor. How the fuck do I know how to tell people what to do? I don't. Shiiit. It's going to be a tough one. But I'll only be there for a while... Ehhh.

The recent sun and recent discovery of Tinariwen have made me want to live in the desert and/or get myself a bad-ass turban. Shiiit. Iive added Africa to the list of places I want to go. The Sahara, Moroccan bazzars. Spices, tea and sun. I want endless sunnn.

I hope it's sunny on my two days off. I've been craving sun and fruit and berries like a mother-f. All winter I've wanted carbs and nuts. Oh how the tables have turned. Oh ho hoooo.

Yeah. Definitely need a turban.

Abandoned Hospital and Chilli.

Broke into an abandoned hospital the other night, here are photos:

Wonderful.

Also, made amazing chilli for dinner tonight. With delicious spicy millet and some wholemeal flatbreads that I lovingly squished flat with my own hands, in the absence of a rolling pin. So delish it deserves it's own photo:

Information overload at the Brighton vegan fair....

Really nearly didn't go to the fair today. Going with just me myself and I like a loser was daunting, it was piddling it down with rain, missed the train by two seconds so I had an hour wait and got kind of lost, somehow. But I made it and it was well worth it!

The thing I noticed first about the place? The smell of nutritional yeast. Wow. Love that smell! And the smell of wonderful spiced veg and grains, lovely! No carcass here, thanks!

The lone ranger thing kind of sucked for the first ten minutes, wandering around like some lost lamb, but I got over my douche-ness and started talking to people. The first guy I spoke to was an incredible guy from the Vegan Organic Network who grew all his vegetables and plants without manure or chemical fertilisers, just other plants and legumes! Mind. Blown. So, even the vegetables I eat have something to do with animals! They're grown in their poo! Especially if they're organic! And the vegetables take up the antibiotics and nonsese that the farm animals are fed, because obviously it all comes out in their poo. Food for thought there! Yuck! Atleast I/we are trying though... If only I had a working vegetable patch!

Spent alot of time talking to a girl from Sea Shepherd, really cool. Bought a badass canvas bag, and I'll look into volunteering. Also spoke to some hunt saboteurs, who I'll definitely volunteer for, there have been a few hunts around here recently and I don't want to let them get away with it.
It was truly bizarre to talk to people about veganism and the state of the world. Every person I spoke to had the same views as me! It was like I'd died and gone to heaven! I spoke to the guy from The Healthy Vegan who had been vegan for 15 years. We spoke about the health benefits and just how crazy meat eaters are... This might seem like I got total cheap thrills over this, but I just don't have any people I know who think as I do, so it was so so so weird to talk to people who thought the same!

I spoke to alot of other stalls, all of which were super interesting and opened my mind even more about animal rights, Sussex Action For Animals being one I will get involved in when I live there! But now I'll talk about foooood.
Food glorious food. Tried an apple crumble cupcake from the ladies from To Happy Vegans, really delicious, but it had a slightly chemically aftertaste! Sorry guys!

There was a crazy family stall downstairs at the back, I didn't get a leaflet to see who they were, but the mum bakes loaf upon loaf upon loaf of totally delicious moist dense vegan fruit cake bread stuff! She sells at markets around London, and I would so go all the way up there to buy another one! I bought an apple, plum and oat cake and some peanut, seaweed, almond and soy milk. Oh my god, it tastes like angels. It's really thick and sweet and wonderful. Made me feel SUPER after just a mouthful! I could feel it making my insides happy. I'm going to try making some. Not my own, sicko! Lamenting the thought of running out of that milk and cake though. Serious rationing with those!



One last thing before I finish what I started on the train back home. Yes, I fell asleep, mouth wide open, catching flies, BY MYSELF, on the train home. And my brain is screaming for sweet slumber. But I cannot sleep until I let you know about Aunty Jee. Holy mother of fuck. I can safely say that I fucking love curry, I've had a few too many in my day. Hers is the best I have ever tried. I had some Soy madras and some aubergine curry as tasters, nearly cried into her daughter's arms about how good it is, and then had to buy a curry wrap about it. Seriously delightful. They don't use preservatives, flavours or cream or ghee or any nonsense at all whatsoever and you can really taste it. I am going to dream about that curry tonight. They only sell it in health stores with freezers, I think. There's a store locator on the sight anyway. I honestly suggest you go out right now and get some. Your life isn't complete without!

Ah, I wanted to write a better blog about how awesome today was, but I didn't realise I'd be so tired when I got in! Hooo! Hopefully you got the gist though. I'll post more links at a later date, mate.