BOOOM chug chuga chug chuggaaaa TSSS

H'ooh, it's been an alrighttt weeekkkk. Went to Sussex Uni on Saturday for the admissions day. As always, me and mum were late and mum was an anti social bint (bless her). Really looking forward to going there, the lecturers are really quirky and awesome (one has a total thing for bats) and most of the students are total hippies. Yesss. Ohh, one awesome thing! When they did lunch, which was a massive table of sandwiches, none of which I could eat, I asked someone if there was any vegan stuff and he ran off and got me a MASSIVE plate of DELICIOUS mushroom risotto, and was totally pleased with himself about it. 100000000 brownie points, sir. I think he was a lecturer also, ahaha. Awesome stuff!

Monday night we went to see A Day To Remember, which was the nutz. I've not been to a kind of hardcore gig before, most of the bands I've seen are crazy in their own way, but not in a hardcore way. Either way, it was too much fucking fun for me to handle. BASS RELEASE?! IN R.L.? Holy mother of diddly. What a sound! My nose still hurts from where I'm pretty sure it came close to being broken, but oh well. Awesome night nonetheless!

Saw my bad man friend Ben last night, who is the only person I know who can cook tofu properly! What a man.

The weather has been lovely recently, really sunny and warm and a little taster of the summer, I hope. Shit's still pretty weak here, no money, need a new job, but atleast I'm happy. If it all goes tits up, all I've got to do it wade through until October 1st, where I will flee to sunny Brighton.

Made some pretty shit-hot-swish food recently, too. I'll do a massive food porn-photo-dump later if time lets me. Ciao for niao

Yet another new beginning

Okay okay, I've got a bit of explaining to do, guys!

Basically the last few weeks have been shit. I've been bottling my prob-lames up, which were pretty big, to no avail, only bullshit, and it's dragged me and a couple of others down too. But it's cool! I have hopefully learnt not to sweep shit under the carpet and tell everyone the issues-for-tissues when they arise. Who wants to guess what the problems were to do with? Go on?...

MONEY!!!

Hooray, 100 points and a pat on the back! And a lollypop for behaving so nicely!

It's really gotten me down, "civilisation" has done me in, all the baggage, all the cruelty, all the violence, all the "I'm more important than you, so you can suffer" ethic which spreads thickly like a fucking "foi gras" pate across our lovely planet. People exploit animals and people exploit people, and not many people do much to stop it. War, speciesism, racism, sexism mannerism... When does it end? I've felt alot of negativity, not alot of positivity over the past couple of weeks. But through it all, the amazing weather and the beauty of the "little things" have helped me. We may be in a shit situation, but guys, we're in it together. It's the little things that really make things great if stuff is bleak.

I was in the field a few days ago and the sunshine was so lovely that I fell asleep in the grass! Even though it was freezing cold and a bit wet! I woke up feeling alive! The other night, when I took Herbs out so he could have his routine late-night shit, I thought the starry sky was full of windows, windows to amazing places, but it was the way my cold breath and the light played in it. I came back to earth exhilarated! We've got a lot of things to be grateful for. We've got plants and flowers to smell and see, we've got animals to love, people to smile about, the sun on our skin, the wind in our hair... I could go on but I'll spare you the details, you know where I'm going!

Thank fuck for the little things. Without a (sometimes accute) awareness of them, I would still be in the doldrums, being an a-hole and seeing an a-hole in everything. But I got through! Even though I have my last few pounds to last me the month, I feel like, again, I have woken up. What the deuce, I keep falling asleep! But the winter will be over, and there will be more little things to smile about.

So, the details for you. I am going to spend less time pissing my life away on the internet, I am going to make things and sell things, I am going to get involved in vegan groups so I can have vegan friends to shoot the shit with (if I can find vegan friends!), I am going to make vegan cupcakes and hopefully find someone to supply them to, I am going to try my darndest with this blog because I really enjoy rambling, and hopefully I am going to get a full time job, to make that fucking stupid thing that I need to get off this island! Money! Shit, how did such apparently intelligent beings get into this state? Giving our only thing we have in this life, our time for an object?! Money! Jeeeeezzz!

So, watch out. Watch out for more vegan "rants", more vegan cupcakes and more vegan insights. Veganism is love and all you need is just that.... Love. LOL.

right, that's it.
i am done with humanity and all it's bullshit
i am going to live in a tree.

Rub a dub dub

It won't stop raining. And I have some time off work. I go back on Thursday. Eugh, I don't think I can hack it there, I'm such a faffer when it comes to cashing up the till at the end of the day. Too much menial responsibility for me there... Might phone up about the old warehouse job I used to have, that killed off a few braincells. But it's all so I can go to Italy then University, so I guess any damage will be justified in the long run. HURGH

Well, anyway, as the weather is utter bollocks, I stayed in my nasty hovel, which, is especially nasty these days. Like some wretched crackwhore, I sit in my filth hole which I haven't cleaned in so long. There's straw all over the floor, it's honestly like a farm in here and I don't care! Not cool!

Down to business. Gave the squealers a bath today, I think they loved it, bless them!

Okay, totally bedraggled here. But they were making their "happy noises"!

Ahh, time off, so lovely. Did a painting last night, for the first time in forever. Stole some of Roma's paints and lied about it, and she instantly found out. She didn't care, and wouldn't have cared, don't actually know why I lied! Fucktard. Been saying mental things recently, must just be MOON MADNESS (yes Rome, another excuse HAHA)

It's not finished, going to rip it up and add splashy-splashy, but not too bad for someone who hasn't created anything in a looong time!

Another thing. One of the ducks is ill, she has a limp and is being bullied by the other ones. So she's in my bathroom, doing her thing. She's eaten loads. Did I write a something about the chicken dying a week ago? I can't remember... But yeah, what is it with animals I know dying recently?! Hella bad karma?! I hope it stops :|

Too tired to continue writing this incoherent bullshit. I'll do a better one or two or three entries before thursday. GOODNIGHHHTT EVERYBODYYYY!!

"Play your cards right or Big Blue's gonna kill you in your sleep"

Me and Roma are badass. get used to it, fooool.

(That's not some wretched skin condition, it's a facepack with paints ontop. BOOYAH)

I'm awaaaake!!

IT HAS BEEN TWO MONTHS OR SO
I MUST HAVE BEEN DEPRESSED OR AN ARSEHOLE
BUT THE OTHER DAY I WOKE UP
AND I AM HAPPY!!!!!!

Ahh, massive apologies to everyone. I have been a huge dick, I don't know what my problem was, but I think I'm back. For good. It actually feels like I've woken up from a long massive sleep! So fucking weird. But I'm really sorry, whoever you are ahah~

In light of this, today I woke up (the sun was out for the first time in about a week!) and took my bad self and Romanz to the Portsmouth, where I blew ca$h that I don't have/belongs to the bank at LUSH. God fucking shit, I love Lush. Best shop ever. I got an awesome sugar lip scrub that tastes of bubblegum, a conditioner and some hair stuff because my mop looks shit recently without any product in it. The great thing about these things? ALL VEGAN! AND NOT TESTED ON MY FURRY OR SCALY FRIENDS! HOW MUCH I DO LOVE YOU, LUSH!

Then I was feeling rich and bought us Shakeaways, I had a soya ginger nut one which was the SHIT even though I had to spend an extra £1 for the priviledge of fucking soya. BUH!!

THEN WE WENT TO HAYLING BEACH. I miss the beach! I basically grew up on Hayling beach. Looking out of the loft window of my grandparent's house, watching the thunder and storms across the sea when I was like 4-5 is one of my clearest memories from being so young. Lovely! Definitely going to make visiting my good friend Poseidon more often. ANYWAY, PHOTOS:










Cleaned out the Squealers, so marched up to the garage to see my sister's bunnies, so, totally trying to stroke this bunny who was all cute and shit, when it fucking BIT ME! I've never been bitten my an animal! Other than spiders in Italy! WTF! Angry bunny?!?! Or do I have bad juju? And it's the most I've bled in ages! Ahh!

I'm up in the woods. I'm down on my miiind.

I went to the woods, for once. Kept that promise I made to myself!

Really regret that I didn't take the time to go there before - what a crazy place! And it's just across the road.


Trees stood silent, telling nothing of what they've seen. But they see.





Because I haven't been in "nature" for some time, I've been too hung up in this silly human nature shabang for too long, I felt somewhat disconnected to begin with. But the further I walked, the more I forgot about home, about the self, and the more immersed in it all I felt. Every woodlouse, every twig, every fallen leaf. It felt like I was a part of it. So, I had a really lovely time in this place.


I would like to get lost in a place like this. Literally. Lose my whereabouts and lose myself. Forget human constraints. Watch bugs do their thing. Listen to the wind rip through the leaves. Feel the rain on my skin. Forget time. It might be something that I have to do in my years to come. Find a desolate place, far from others and lose it!




But I might never come back. That doesn't scare me. Woods are a scary place. Life is a scary place sometimes. Aaaanyway. Came out of the woods into this amazing field, where the soil was all burnt, but it was soaking wet.

The photo actually came out like this!

Something in the middle caught my eye. It was a tree with a ladder up in, with a seat at the top! Really funny; somehow it made me really lonely and sad because the seat was big enough for two! And I really wanted to share it all with someone and climb it. But there was a little sign on one of the rungs. "No unauthorised persons allowed beyond this point". What?! Who are you to authorise my access up this ladder! Or am I too lame to be "allowed" on this seat of pure awesomeness. Hahah, made myself laugh. And I didn't climb it. Mutha-F. One day though.


Thought it was about time I started heading back after this, so I walked up to the top of the clearing and it started to piss it down with rain. Herbs (my dog) absolutely hates rain. Poor boy. Once the rain came down, the wood came alive. Crows started fighting, everything had movement. There was wind. I smiled to myself and we ran back into the woods.

I felt alive! I'm definitely going to take the time more often to get back to the roots.